A Letter from the Future

 

Dear One,

Watching you the past few months brings up tears of happiness and pride.

And I am proud of you, for it would have been much easier to quit.

outdoor market area, Santa Fe, New Mexico

You, however, are not a quitter.

You persist.

“Persistence guarantees that results are inevitable.” – Paramahansa Yogananda

You commit with your whole heart and then do what it takes to follow through.

Just one of the many things I love about you.

Your passion and persistence are like arrows to my heart.

The way you weave your feelings into words. . .well, just slay me now.

I’m crushing on you.

Lovin’ you up, all the way from the future.

xo

Sandi Amorim signature

 

 

How to Break Free of a Burnout

 

Too many people are headed for burnout. Maybe you’re one of them.

“Burnout is nature’s way of telling you, you’ve been going through the motions your soul has departed; you’re a zombie, a member of the walking dead, a sleepwalker.” – Sam Keen

Because here’s the thing – no one is immune.

I’m pretty sure even the Dalai Lama has to manage this to some degree. It’s part of the human condition, and we all go through it from time to time.

Sometimes it’s because you don’t know how to say no.

Other times it’s due to overwhelm of the awesome kind. There are simply too many great things to do, attend or take part in.

Either way, burnout is imminent.

“Just like there’s always time for pain,
there’s always time for healing.” – Jennifer Brown

If you’re too far gone down the path, you may not be able to avoid it.

The good news is, you don’t have to stay stuck there.

So grab a notebook and a pen. We’re doing this the old school way.

Ready?

 

MAKE TWO LISTS: 

List #1

Start with Danielle LaPorte’s infamous ‘stop doing’ list. 

Sit yourself down and get real.

I start with everything that’s currently on my plate – commitments, promises, projects, whatever.

Then I go through the list letting myself feel whatever energy comes up.

If my gut winces or my brow furrows, I get rid of it.

Do this with integrity.

If other people are involved, let them know where you’re at. Clean it up, repromise, change your mind – it’s all good when done in service of you being of greater service, to yourself and others.

If your gut flutters and you smile as you look at the item on the list, it’s a keeper.

It’s not rocket science. Trust your body. It never lies.

 

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Loving Kindness & You

 

Virginia Satir wrote the following poem after a session with a young client who had a lot of questions about herself and what life meant.

We all have those questions.

But it’s easy to forget and think we’re alone. During a challenging time in my life I read this poem often. It made a profound difference for me.

It spoke straight to my heart, and soothed me.

In a world that could use more love and kindness, I share it with an invitation to be kind – to others and most especially yourself.

 

I am me.

In all the world, there is no one exactly like me.

There are persons who have some parts like me,
but no one adds up exactly like me.

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No One Does It Alone


Buddha in profile, monks walking away

No one does it alone.

It’s easy to forget that.

Maybe your past has turned into a story about why:

But everyone needs help sometimes. Especially those of us who think we can go it alone.

It’s tough to talk about; God knows I don’t like admitting it.

But here’s the truth I know today. . .

No one can or should do it alone, and even the Lone Ranger had Tonto.

We’ve all got stories, plenty of them, but those stories suck the joy out of life and lead to a dark and scary neighbourhood where your lizard brain thrives.

It’s easy to hang onto the stories and forget that you have amazing people in your life. Call me Pollyanna but I am certain that you do.

People who light you up with their joy, show you the way when you feel lost and love you no matter what.

This is a love note to them.

 

Dear One,

Who you are is a recent gift, for which I am grateful.

Who you are gives me comfort, and like Linus with his blanket I feel safe.

Who you are is a beacon, lighting my path when I think I’m at the end.

Who you are is love in human form; remembering your hug makes me smile.

Who you are for me reminds me of who I am for others.

Some days I have to dig deep to remember you are there, nestled safe and snug in my heart.

Some days I try to avoid who you are, for your light reflects mine. . .and I can hardly be with that.

And when you, yourself, forget who you are, come to me and I will tell you. Search my heart and you will find. . .you.

You remind me that I don’t have to go it alone.

And with my whole heart I thank you.

xoS

 

 

Ode to Joy

I heard a Hawaiian phrase recently – malama pono – which means ‘take good care of yourself’ and I wondered, do you?

Do you take care of yourself the way you know you should or do you coast through life taking your health and well-being for granted?

heart shaped stone etched with word joy

I know I don’t always take the best care of myself, distracted by business, commitments to others and yes, I admit it – sometimes laziness.

What? A life coach admitting to laziness? Not too common I know, but hey I’m human and I’ve got my challenges just like you do!

It’s been four months since I first focused on self-care in the month-long homage. Four months during which time my focus has waxed and waned as reliably as the moon.

And it makes sense that I’m thinking of it again now as I’ve been in Maui the past two weeks and self-care has been effortless, creating a sense of well-being and joy I haven’t felt in a very long time.

This focus on self-care and joy was partly inspired by Andrea Olson’s recent post 100 Tiny Pulses along with Martha Beck’s Joy Diet, not new but an empowering menu of daily practices for a happier life. But more on that in a minute.

While here in Maui, this is what effortless has looked like.

Typical vacation day:

  • Up between 6-6:3oam
  • 15 minutes of meditation (sometimes watching the horizon for whales)
  • Breakfast of fresh fruit, yogurt, maca and nuts
  • An hour or two of writing
  • Day’s activity
  • Picnic lunch made with fresh local ingredients
  • Lots of walking and fresh air
  • Healthy dinner, usually grilled with fresh veggies
  • Asleep by 10:30pm

What’s important to note about this regime is this – it’s pretty simple, and more importantly it’s sustainable.

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Mirror, Mirror on the Wall

 

When you look in the mirror what do you see?

Some days it’s not easy.

You look at your reflection in the mirror and feel an onslaught of thoughts, many of them negative as the lizard brain sings its song of seduction.

Maybe you barely look, glancing just long enough to comb your hair, brush your teeth or apply make-up.

Or maybe you use one of those scary magnifying mirrors so that all you can see are your parts.

eyes. . .brows. . .nose. . .ears. . .lips. . .teeth. . .skin. . . limbs

“If you are irritated by every rub, how will your mirror be polished?” – Rumi

And you are irritated by those parts; the ones you judge and assess, or compare against others.

 

Do you ever really see YOU?

Some days it’s not easy.

I know. I get it. But I have a different view.

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Mea Culpa, Mea Corpus

 

Mea culpa.

I’m sorry it’s been so long since I’ve cared for you, cherished you the way you so deserve.

Mea corpus.

My body, strong, resilient, reliable. . .oh how I’ve neglected you.

It’s time for a heart to heart. To make amends.

 

Do you know you’re beautiful exactly the way you are?

No? That saddens me and yet I’m not surprised. It’s not something I’ve often said to you, is it.

Mea culpa mea corpus.

For I should have made sure you knew. I didn’t.

Instead, I focused on my mind, showering it with love and attention. You, got very little, and still you thrived, glowing with health for most of my life.

Have I thanked you?

No? That saddens me too for I pride myself on being mindful, appreciating the good in my life.

And you have been so very good.

Mea culpa.

I know you’re tired, and a bit worn out but I have finally heard your whisper. I am so grateful you have not given up.

The time has come and I’ve promised to give you my full attention.

My heart and devotion.

I have a lot to make up for, but I’m willing.

Mea culpa my beautiful body.

It’s time for a new beginning.

“We delight in the beauty of the butterfly, but rarely admit the changes it has gone through to achieve that beauty.” – Maya Angelou

Over to you: 

  • Write a letter to your body.
  • Ask forgiveness for however it’s gone to date.
  • Then create and promise a new future.

 

This is an exercise from the 66 Day Self-Care Challenge. Take part in the challenge by commenting and using the #66days hashtag and connecting with me and C.A. Kobu on Twitter. Download the workbook  and leave a comment below. 

 

 

Just for Today

Just for today. . .

Just for today. . .

do. . .nothing

SEE your beauty

delight your senses

listen to your body

affirm your greatness

own your lusciousness

express your  l o n g  i n g s

choose SELF-ish over selfless

appreciate your surroundings

shine so bright people stop in awe

release old hurts, grudges and resentments

rest when you need. . .to-do list be damned

laugh – out loud and often – feel your belly shake

Brene Brown bookmark

 

be in JOY

live out LOUD

expose your Self

stake your claim

forgive. . .for you

honour your needs

give up your reasons

 

speak softly, breathe deeply

nourish mind-body-spirit

LEAN into vulnerability

favour your strengths

express devotion

SING your tune

be who you BE

just for today. . .

just for today. . .

love with your WHOLE heart

25 Breaks to Energize You

 

It’s easy to feel overwhelmed, stressed and drained in your day-to-day life isn’t it?

Inundated by email, voicemail and texts for starters, there’s an unspoken assumption that you should be available 24/7. And that’s before taking into account your kids, spouse or partner!

24/7 . . .

Do you really want to be that available?

I felt my energy drain just writing that!

The truth is everything in life is either giving you energy or draining it. The best way to combat the energy drain is to be at your most resourceful by building up and replenishing your energy throughout the day.

This is an opportunity to get creative and proactive about your self-care – a very good thing to take on during this month-long Homage to Self-Care

With a little attention, you can integrate these breaks into your life and with practice, develop new habits that top up your energy leaving you feeling better than ever.

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Paying Homage to Self-Care

 

Homage: respect or reverence paid

Self-care: care for oneself

For a few months I’ve been shifting my focus to self-care due to some physical challenges. Nothing life threatening, but challenging none the less.

In my enthusiasm and passion for the work I love (coaching & writing), I’d been spending increasingly more time at my desk, focusing on my mind and forgetting the body and spirit part of the system.

Here’s what my body reminded me of. . .

It’s not about what you know, it’s about how you live and the choices you make each day.

Ouch. They say we teach what we most need to learn, and I’m getting the message loud and clear!

female sculpture in front of grass

 

Brene Brown says that calm is the ability to manage your emotional reactivity.

Calm is a superpower.

Truth is, it’s pretty tough to manage your reactivity when you don’t feel resourceful or when you’re body’s in crisis.

 

The shift to focusing on myself, specifically my body has not been easy and it doesn’t come naturally to me.

My tendency is usually to focus on and be there for others, and I know I’m not alone in this.

Friends, family, clients – I hear it often – everyone is challenged by the daunting task of taking care of ourselves.

Why is that?

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